Hugo Chavez and Castro

Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez said that Fidel Castro has visibly improved from his illness.

He describes Castro as being one of the healthiest invisible men he's ever seen. "You'd have to see it to believe it," he said.... "wait! I mean, take my word on it..."

Chavez was given free rein to run Venezuela yesterday by the country's legislature.

Chavez said that with this elimination of opposition, he no longer worries about having to put his neck on the line, but not being able to locate it.

His first acts since obtaining the wider power, were to: declare that every Venezuelan must believe that Fidel Castro is healthy; seize all foreign assets in the country and place them on the Colts to cover; overturn the no-sharing policy at Shoney's buffets.