Gov. Christie's Warning

During a streaming interview from Facebook's offices, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie said Republicans have an uphill battle in the fight for the White House next year.  (story)

He said just thinking of it made him sweat out his morning cheese steak.

Whaling Protesters Toss Butter

Anti-whaling activists sprayed a Japanese whaling ship near Antarctica with butyric, mild form of acid made from spoiled butter, but no passenger of the vessel was impacted. [ Story ]

So it seems the great ocean vessel is immune to the butter from the land of lakes.

Prince Harry in Afghanistan

Britain's Prince Harry has been secretly serving in Afghanistan since mid-December. [ story ]

So that Prince you sold a dime bag to last week in Chelsea was an impostor.

Record-high ratio of Americans in prison

For the first time in American history, more than one in one hundred adults is in jail or prison. [ see story ]

It's taken as a sign of patriotism. People would rather do a winter stint in prison than accept reduced heating oil from Hugo Chavez.

EU Fines Microsoft

The European Union Antitrust Commission has fined Microsoft a record $1.4 billion. [ See story ]

Fortunately for Microsoft, it had the equivalent 40 euros on hand.

Chinese Mad at Spielberg

The Chinese are angry that Steven Spielberg has quit as artistic adviser to the opening and closing ceremonies of the Beijing Summer Olympics. [ see story ]

As a protest, they're threatening not to bootleg any of his films.

Hillary Ixnays Tax Doc Release

Hillary Clinton said she would not release her income tax returns unless she secures the Democratic presidential nomination. [ See story ]

That puts voters in next week's primaries in a real dilemma: vote for change, or find out if pantsuits are deductible.