Hillary Ixnays Tax Doc Release

Hillary Clinton said she would not release her income tax returns unless she secures the Democratic presidential nomination. [ See story ]

That puts voters in next week's primaries in a real dilemma: vote for change, or find out if pantsuits are deductible.

Clinton's Stewardess Spoof

Hillary Clinton welcomed the press corp onto her campaign plane yesterday with a humorous spoof of the standard flight attendant safety speech. [See story]

The press responded with a long drawn-out collective cackle that lasted the entire trip.

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No feelings were hurt, as the stewardess on duty was busy showing Clinton's husband how to operate the lavatory.

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An angered flight attendant attempted to ground the plane, announcing "Great takeoff, Miss Hillary. Now that will be the only takeoff y'all are gonna get today," before being overpowered by an AP reporter.

Hillary Clinton Campaign

Hillary Clinton declared she is entering the race for the Democratic nomination for president.

She is said to have increased her appeal the past few years among conservatives, by becoming an old lady.

In her announcement, she invited people to converse with her, saying "Let's talk. Let's chat."

She added: "Especially you, Monica. I still really want to have a nice chat with you."